It’s quite presumptuous, quite arrogant, whether one is an aspiring lawyer/doctor or a college freshman, to set out with the goal of “changing the world”. You are one person in one city in one state of one country on one continent on one planet. And within the history of the world, my entire lifetime is just a blip on the screen, if that. Putting that together, giving some context within what all has transpired before us and will happen after we’re six feet under, the odds of you or me changing the world are.….not in our favor. It’s kind of funny that we all know that, but still regularly function as if our own little world is at the center.
And there are several presumptions in play when one sets out to ‘change the world’.
I remember a day when I was considering how I was going to set something straight and aright in a situation. All of a sudden it occurred to me how pridefuL that was and how aggressive. All of a sudden, while driving on I 55 north right where it joins with I 20 east, I was able to see that I was making a minimum of 4 presumptions: 1) that I know what would be right 2) that it needed to be set right 3) that I’m the person that is supposed to do it 4) that I will be successful. Dang. I don’t know where that epiphany came from, but at that moment, a mirror had been handed to me.
Obviously it’s not wrong to want better for the world. Every conscientious person since the beginning of time, whenever that was, wouldn’t want to leave things the same or, God forbid, make them worse.
Unattainable goals do not serve us well. They sound great, and they may make us feel good. Even the “I just want to make a difference”, can be problematic. I think it’s kinda like when someone decides they want to fall in love. It works against itself. If you try to make it happen, it’s less likely.
Obviously we can live only in the small part of the world we inhabit. As my father used to say, “Life is so er’y day”, and he was so right. So many people who self-consciously set out to “change the world” had an “er’y day” life that fell apart. Some who are lauded in textbooks or in the news left a trail of unhappy and sometimes abused people in their wake.
So, then. What do we do?
There are two things that help me with this. I read a book whose author quoted a friend who was dying of cancer. Her goals had become simple— create beauty, give love, find peace. I now have that embroidered and hanging where I see it nearly every day. When I find myself overwhelmed with various crises in my surroundings or have succumbed to good-sounding but unmeetable goals, I find those simple exhortations bring clarity and focus. I can do those anywhere, any time, and in any situation. If I were in a nursing home or living all alone without much interaction, those things could still be done in various ways. It has been done in much more dire circumstances than I may ever find myself in.
While that motto covers what I myself can do, the other one relates to interaction. Slightly paraphrasing psychologist Jordan Peterson, “It is not wise to trust someone whose primary means of changing the world is by changing other people.” Watch out for the person who consistently finds that others are to blame for his or her ills and vices and maladies. Draw near to those who are doing what they can to make themselves better e’ry day.
It’s all about attainable goals. And I sincerely believe that when we meet those good attainable goals, simple though they may be, we strengthen all that is Good in some way we don’t see. We actually might become part of Making the World Better. And if I’m wrong about that, at the very least, it’s our best shot and makes our little corners better.
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